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Activities Children need to learn that little signs of appreciation can be very important to other people. And manners are a part of respecting and caring for the feelings of others. If we turn the chore of learning manners into a game, children will get the practice they need without embarrassing us or themselves. As you teach the importance of manners, you may need to be honest about what your child can expect form others. Mom, why do you make such a fuss when I chew with my mouth open? Because it's ugly for other people to see. Good manners show respect for other people. What's respect? It means caring how other people feel. If I care about them, will they care about me? Not always, Paul. Some people don't care and never will, no matter how kind we are to them. But in our family, we do care. Gifts From the Heart Have your child give a gift of himself at the next holiday or any time he wants to do something nice for someone else. What you'll need Crayons, pencils, paints, or other art supplies Paper Packaging from around the house Your child's special gift What To Do 1. Talk to your child about gift giving. What does it mean to give something to someone else? 2. Instead of buying a gift, have your child make a gift. Does your child have a special talent? Maybe your child would like to sing or write a song for a relative? Is there a chore your child could do? Maybe wash the dishes for a week. Is there a special toy that could be loaned to a sister or brother for a week? 3. Use materials from around the house so that little, if any, money is spent. 4. If the gift is an activity or chore, have your child make a card with a note on it, telling what the gift will be. 5. Have your child use imagination in making an inviting package. Perhaps your child could paint a small rock and wrap it in a big box. Or make an envelope out of the comics from the Sunday newspaper. Most young children don't have money to buy a gift for a friend or relative. You can teach your child that a gift that shows effort and attention can mean more than a gift from the store. Honesty, the Best Policy Children need to learn that benefiting from manipulating or lying to others is dishonest and unworthy of them. What to do 1. Tell the story about the boy who cried "Wolf!" so many times to get attention that when the wolf finally came, no one believed him. 2. Ask your child if anyone has ever lied to her. How did that make her feel? 3. Be careful to follow through on things you say to your child. Commitments that may seem minor to you can mean a lot to your child. Make promises and keep them. Our children need to learn about the importance of trusting each other in our everyday lives. Without honesty, trust becomes impossible. There's A Monster In My Room Sometimes our children have needless fears that we can help them overcome. What to do 1. Listen when your child mentions a fear, even if it sounds silly to you. 2. With your child, come up with a plan for facing up to the fear. 3. Go through the plan together. Let your child take the step that confronts the fear, although it may be helpful for you to be there. Children should learn not to allow others to mistreat them. At the same time, we want them to learn how to reach understandings peacefully, whenever possible. Bully Children should learn not to allow others to mistreat them. At the same time, we want them to learn how to reach understandings peacefully, whenever possible. What to do 1. Listen to your child and find out if others are not treating your child as they should. This will encourage your child to trust you and come to you when there is a problem. 2. Help your child consider various ways of dealing with a particular problem. 3. If the problem is the way another child is behaving, suggest working out the problem by talking with the other child, or a responsible adult. 4. If the problem is another adult, however, or if your child is seriously threatened by other children, you will need to intervene directly. A part of self-respect is not tolerating mistreatment by others. Finding appropriate ways to deal with unpleasant behavior by others is an important, if sometimes difficult, part of growing up. Helping Out Our children need to learn that as they get older and can contribute more, more will be expected of them. What to do 1. As your child matures, consider additional ways your child can contribute to the household. 2. Discuss the new duties with your child. Avoid describing them in ways that seem like a punishment. Instead, you can imply that they require a new level of ability, which your child now possesses. 3. With younger children, it helps sometimes if you do the chores together and talk or make it fun. But don't do your child's work! 4. If possible, new tasks should stretch a child's abilities and encourage satisfaction in good work. Praise something done well, especially a new challenge. Go on to the next section: |
Copyright Ahren Lotze 2006- all right reserved